Of all the shocking information that was disclosed in the Ashley Madison leak, the most surprising revelation was perhaps exactly how bad at cheating so many men are. From using their real e-mail addresses to paying for affairs with shared credit cards, the users of Ashley Madison have proven that they’re not just into cheating, but they’re pretty bad at it too (unless they meant to get caught).
Cheating on your partner is obviously a lousy thing to do, but as women, we know that if something is worth doing, it’s worth doing right. Here are a few ways we’d just be better at the side-d*ck game than the boys are.
1. We’ve Seen Enough Soapy Shows to Know What We’re Doing
We’ve tuned into enough shocking season finales to know to cover our tracks. Maybe those guys should have been paying more attention to those “chick flicks” they make fun of so much.
2. We’re Used to Giving Out Fake Numbers and E-mails
Thanks to the barrage of unwelcome advances, we have a pseudo identity at the ready and mad ghosting skills at all times.
3. If We Smelled Like Someone Else’s Cologne, We Could Always Blame it on Sampling at Sephora
Ladies can wear Chanel Bleu too, you know.
4. We Have Access to Far More Products That Would Help Us Stay Stealthy
Unlike our dude counterparts, we have enough exfoliants, creams, lotions, and concealers to hide everything from the faint smell of aftershave to a full-blown lunch date romp.
5. We’re Emotionally Intelligent and Could Likely Detect if Our Partner were Suspicious
Wait until the situation blew up into a full-blown catastrophe? Yeah, no. We’d be trouble shooting at the first sign of a slightly bad mood.
6. We Wouldn’t Use a Freaking Credit Card for Illicit Activities
We’re detail oriented and thus pay attention to the little things…like the fact that our spouse gets the same credit card statement as us.
7. If We Were Going to do Something Sneaky like Cheating, We Wouldn’t do it on a Website.
You can’t screenshot a quickie, know what we mean?
All gifs care of giphy.com
Source: Women’s Health Mag